| October 11, 2009
Hello! Welcome to the first of a monthly newsletter that I hope you will find informative, enjoyable, and helpful. Ideally, I hope you look forward to it arriving in your email box as a lift in the middle of each month, follow up by attending the end of the month Go There! call, and then spend the beginning of each month sending me tips, resources, ideas, etc., for the next edition!
I would also like to provide 2 definitions that I hope don't ever come up here! Because I will never add someone to my mailing list nor will I ever give away your information to others, this may not be a problem — but just in case...
- Spam, as most of us know, is the name for unwanted mail, voicemails, or emails that you didn't solicit.
- Bacon is mail, voicemail, or email that you subscribed to, but just don't listen to or read.
It is my hope to keep Another Isolated Incident vegetarian (yes, cheese still applies!).
Thank you for subscribing!
Jess
I don’t know if it was listening to the Judge Sonya Sotomayor hearings, or maybe with the camp of impoverished youth who were kicked out of a swimming pool that had been privately rented out in advance, or maybe it was a Harvard Professor getting arrested in his own home – not sure when, but I heard for the first time and I mean really heard the phrase “another isolated incident.” If you have two isolated incidents there could be a pattern. If you have three in the same week, that is a pattern. Patterns don’t lie. Incidents of racism are not gone, but are part of the fabric of our everyday experiences. These incidents are also not isolated in any way. Every incident has a direct impact of the group wielding power and the group being oppressed. No matter how much the privileged work to isolate the marginalized groups, we cannot escape from the harm and pain of every incident. By virtue of saying “another” – there is direct evidence that there is a lot of work to be done. Yeah for job security.
Reflections from the Road: Time
It is interesting to me how valuable time is – how fast it can go by – how slow it can creep – how powerful almost no time can be – and how mindlessly I pay attention to the fullness of the limited time I have… Time.
As of late I have tried to make the most of time on the road by visiting and connecting with folks I deeply care about. Sometimes, I get to learn to make bok choy and mushroom risotto and heirloom tomato sandwiches with a friend and brilliant children, other times, I am crashing on a couch and the friend buzzes in and buzzes back out leaving the door unlocked and fresh towels on the table. Sometimes, I am renting a car and driving 3 to 7 hours out of my way to spend an afternoon with someone who needs a smile or to meet a new family member before they turn one year old. Then there are the times that I send a random text to a friend with an inside joke (QQTF!) or get a song on my voice mail to make me smile while in a Super 8 hotel. All of these moments happen and are deeply important to me. Taking a detour to eat good food someone found while getting lost themselves or taking a recommendation from neighbors on airplanes – this is living a life, reconnecting to those close to me, and exploring the unknown.
Then there is too much… recently, after a delayed flight, I met a dear friend at baggage claim for precisely 34 minutes until I had to take a shuttle to another state. I apologized for trying to do too much in a short amount of time, but I really wanted to see her. Maybe I am being selfish or maybe I am just being like my dad. This friend, in the airport gas station parking lot, looks me in the eyes and says plainly, I have always been like my dad. This realization brings me to apologize to friends from graduate school who now have three children, the middle one being just a few days old last time I was there who is now disappointed that her parent’s crazy friend never showed up night after night or to the amazing student leader that wanted to share her amazing progress on campus that just got plainly stood up. It also brings me to reconnect to friends and even my father in that my realm of influence always takes the time it needs and can always use more.
Time – an often forgotten tool of social justice.
35 Dumb Things Well-Intended People Say: Surprising Things We Say That Widen the Diversity Gap
Have you ever heard yourself or someone else say, “Some of my best friends are…(Black, Asian, Gay, etc.)”? or “I don’t think of you as…(Disabled, Jewish, etc. )”? and not understand why some people would be offended? In her new book, 35 Dumb Things Well-Intended People Say: Surprising Things We Say That Widen the Diversity Gap, Dr. Maura Cullen, a Diversity trainer with more than twenty-five years of experience, shares lessons she has learned throughout her career on how to communicate effectively when conversations take a wrong turn.
 35 Dumb Things provides an abbreviated list of everyday comments and explains why they can be interpreted as grossly offensive. There is also a section entitled “Best Bet” which offers a more positive way to reply. Using real-life stories, practical examples and lighthearted humor, she illustrates how to transform our conversations around issues of diversity.
To order the book visit www.TheDiversitySpeaker.com.
How to Be an Ally to Transgender and People with an Intersex Condition
Validate people’s gender expression. It is important to refer to a transgender person by the pronoun appropriate to their gender identity. In other words, if someone identifies as female, then refer to the person as she; if they identify as male, refer to the person as he. If you are not sure, ask them. Never use the word “it” when referring to someone who is transgendered. To do so is incredibly insulting and disrespectful. Some transgender people prefer to use gender- neutral pronouns: “hir” instead of “her” and “his,” and “sie” or “ze” instead of “she” and “he.”
Top 10 Issues I Get To Address While Holding A Microphone… That You Might Regret Asking Me
One of the scariest truths is that once I am given a microphone, I can and am often encouraged to "speak my truth with care." This section highlights some of my most passionate thoughts about some of the toughest questions I get asked. Enjoy.
I typically am asked via text, “What do I think or feel about Hispanic/Latino issues today?” I find that, with just barely a scratch, the real question here is, “How do I think/feel about illegal immigrations?” I have a number of thoughts here, all of which are controversial. First, I think the term illegal is pejorative and alien is insensitive at best. The term should be undocumented and most people I know don’t regularly carry their social security card, passport, visas, or green cards on their persons at all times. Moreover, there are more undocumented people coming in from the northern border than our southern border every year. It is our racism that doesn’t think of “brown” people in Canada and that we need to feel threatened by only non-white people. Lastly, those folks that are immigrating (documented or not) from our southern border are very likely returning to land that their ancestors at one point lived on and cultivated complex cultures that whites should call “civilizations,” but then these whites wouldn’t have felt justified to steal the land and commit genocide in the first place. Just in case this doesn’t cover the question, I would also add that I live in a country based on difference and freedom to express that difference AND is powered and empowers only those with white skin, certain amounts of capital access and education, English speaking, and Protestant faiths. Borders, gates, fences, and laws that are put in place to protect the “American Way” limit freedom to some at the expense to more twho never had a chance. This is how American culture remains steeped in racism and a system of white supremacy. As long as anyone says to themselves or others, “I don’t want [insert group here] to have what I have because I have earned it and they haven’t,” is supporting a larger system of oppression and in complicity in that oppression.
Social Justice Quotations That Keep Me Going
History matters. It matters whether we tell the truth about what happened centuries ago, and it matters whether we tell the truth about more recent history. It matters because, if we can’t, we will never be able to face the present, guaranteeing that our future will be doomed.
Robert Jensen, The Heart of Whiteness: Confronting Race, Racism, and White Privilege
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September Summary
Wow - my brain is pudding! First, I was 15 minutes late to my own conference call because I got lost in Wordle.net - have you seen this word cloud business? WARNING Time Suck Vortex has been located at wordle.net!!!!
Then we started talking (Thanks Timothy, for the email nudge – I guess I can't claim that I take email breaks either – damn) – I brought up the both/and of race and health care reform – meaning President Carter says it is racism, Obama says he was black before becoming President, and Clinton says some of the stuff is just opposing health care reform to start our conversation, but the participants vetoed this as they don't really watch the news. Another WARNING – if you start watching Rachel Maddow, you can't stop – you may even find yourself cursing the late Senator Kennedy's death for interrupting regularly scheduled Rachel Maddow episodes for life documentaries to be shown instead – I digress...
So, I then brought up bias training for search committees on campuses which lead to a conversation about bias on campuses in general. This lead to a brain altering, stirring, pudding making conversation about social justice work – damn Go There! calls, making us think in the middle of the day.
So here is the parting question: In doing SJ work where does personal responsibility and bystander behavior intersect with fear or apathy and at this intersection is there enough motivation to continue the fight?
Noodle on that for a while, and we will see you on the next call October 21st 3pm EST.
What is Go There?
No Safe Space Rules! No Guidelines! No Peace Keeper! No Debriefing! Just one thing... Go There! Join us and engage in deep conversations about social justice issues. There is no charge to join the call.
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